The Decline and Fall of the Roma empire

I just love football. No surprises there, I know. But the fact that there are surprises, always, on all levels makes it such an amazing sport. That and a million other things.

7-1 in a Champions League quarter final? When the winning team had actually lost the first leg? Not only that, but three days earlier looked comparatively feeble? Surely not. I wasn’t going to write about this game, I just watched it because it was on the telly and snuggled up in my sofa, eating grapes and fully expecting to be only moderately entertained. The press had expressed scepticism about United’s chances against an elegant Roma side who had defended well throughout the competition; especially a United depleted by injuries and suspensions. Man U may have had the best league season of any team since the 19^th century, but their cup runs have been less spectacular. I fell asleep during their drab first game against Lille. I was getting used to the idea of having Liverpool as the only remaining English side left, and with a shot at winning the whole thing as well. So how the same group of players, albeit deployed differently in terms of starts and substitutions, that were unable to overcome Portsmouth on Saturday did what they did today is anybody’s guess.

But this was just football at its most bizarrely entertaining, not in the sense that there was any suspense left after 20 minutes, but the fact that this is top level European football, that this is supposed to be a battle of equals and that it just wasn’t. Manchester United ruled the field. Roma had a bright few minutes in the beginning and then went into a steady decline. The famous defence was nowhere to be seen and United repeatedly cut through it like a warm knife through butter on a sunny day. Roma’s elegant build-up attempts looked like slow motion compared to United’s quick responses. Darren Fletcher and Michael Carrick worked like terriers, collecting the ball and setting it in motion in the opposite direction where Giggs, Ronaldo, Rooney and Smith picked it up and charged, uncannily aware of each other’s movements, towards goal. The perfect mix of aggression, fluency and creativity left Roma utterly without answers and towards the end the tormented Roma players looked like they just wanted to disappear. Who can blame them.

12: Ronaldo, lovely work on the right, perfect pass to Carrick – in position, unmarked and ready to place the slightly curved ball over Doni and into the goal.

17: Rooney passes to Fletcher in the middle, Chivu fails miserably in clearing it and Smith cuts right through the defence and fires it in.

19: Fletcher sends a great ball to Giggs on the right side, Giggs expertly crosses into the middle of the box where Rooney is able to run between Chivu and Mexes and tap the ball past Doni.

44: Giggs sends a lovely pass from the centre of the field to Ronaldo who times a great run on the right flank, does a bit of magic to rid himself of defenders and sends a great shot straight past Chivu and Doni.

49: Great effort from Rooney, wins ball and sends it to Giggs, who crosses in towards the goalmouth from the left wing; Smith blocks Chivu while Ronaldo taps it into goal.

60: Ronaldo works magic on the right hand side, crosses over to Heinze who picks out Carrick in the middle, allowing for another powerful shot from far out for the midfielder.

69: Lovely cross from Totti on the right is followed by a sumptuous volley from de Rossi, Roma get a consolation goal.

81: Solskjaer passes to Evra from the right flank, the defender takes a slightly speculative shot which, because that was the kind of night this was, takes a bounce on the post and into goal.

So, basically, after 20 minutes this was already less of a competition than an circus performance. But United kept pushing on, making all kinds of efforts and winning everything – I felt as though I was watching a metaphor for their entire season, something along the lines of having won so much that you just keep on doing it. Psychological momentum and all that. I know I sound like I’m about to pull on a red shirt, but honestly, only the staunchest of Manchester United haters could have helped applauding this performance. Actually, the staunchest of Manchester United haters would have turned off the telly. For those of us who enjoy the game being played with this assertive magical touch it was practically pornography, even when the losing team started giving up.

Oh, and honourable mention to the referee, who had a great game. How nice it is to see an astute referee who actually knows what he is doing and… Sorry, back on that again. Elsewhere, Chelsea did what they do and got a win in Spain. I didn’t see the game but am told that they were good – and that Mourinho did that thing he does and responded with impressive cunning to the situation, again winning a game by tactical adjustments. It’s getting a bit annoying that. And can someone send Steve “I’ll stick to 4-4-2 and the same tactics against any team in any situation” McClaren on an internship with him?

If today was anything to go by, the "goal scoring curse" that has plagued English football over Easter is over. But it wouldn’t surprise me if Manchester United lose to Watford in the FA-cup. Actually it would. But surprises will come. And how wonderful that is.